Digressions

Remind anybody of anything familiar?

I made this post after following the links that showed where people were arriving at my Space from. 90% of my hits over the past 4 weeks have been people searching on Google for words like "Laganas Orgy" "Lesbians Zante" "Orgy in Argassi"

A newspaper is reporting depraved activities have brought shame on British holidaymakers on the Greek island of Zante.

Tourists have told The Sun they saw boozed-up youngsters stripping, groping and romping with strangers in nightclubs where Brits were given as much drink as they wanted.

It's claimed most of the debauchery centred on a bar in the resort of Laganas which has a reputation for attracting young revellers.

The bar has since been closed as part of a clampdown by police after mobile phone video footage was shown on Greek TV.

(Source: http://www.realholidayguides.com/holidaynews.htm)

Well, back from Argassi (Αργασσι), Zakynthos Island, Greece, and boy do I have a big blog entry for this! Where do I start? Well, I can safely say that I really enjoyed myself overall and it was utterly amazing.

I’ve broken up most of what we did into different days, so hopefully I’ve got everything, but if anyone notices mistakes or missing stuff, please just e-mail me or post to tell me.

Hey to the Zante crew (lol) Mike, Han, Vix, Chris, Kate, Emma, Nai, Laura, Kath, Gem, Steph, Sam, Tom, Julie, Charlotte!

 

Sunday 3rd

Got up really early today, but even so I was cutting it very close when we were leaving. Nothing to worry about though as the minibus was late arriving at Kate’s so it was all cool. I found out that you’re not allowed scissors in your hand luggage anymore, so quickly stuffed them in my case. Minibus driver went off course a bit and took us round the houses trying to find Laura’s house, but in all fairness there are like 2 Moorend Road’s. Was a long journey to Gatwick, but we stopped at the services on the way and I had a crack at Time Crisis 3 (iirc) with Mike. Amazing game, even though I wasn’t awake at first.

When we finally got to Gatwick it wasn’t long before we were all checked in and ready to go, unfortunately we had arrived like a million hours early, but it was all cool. We had time to go and have lunch and I got a Su Doku book from Smiths to have a go at on the plane and in the mornings.

This must have been the first time that I have properly spoken to Han whilst I have been 100% sober I reckon, which I quietly found amusing. Was sat by Naomi and Laura on the plane, although I wasn’t really talkative, but I think I was just tired after travelling all day and now on a plane. They let me have the window seat which was nice of them because I love the window seat whilst flying, although I keep quiet about it so that other people can sit there if they want and not feel bad about me wanting it. The flight was quite long, 4 hours, and there was the 2 hour time shift too so when we landed, 6 hours had passed. Landing was a bit rough, I think the runway at Kalamaki is a bit short and they have to stop very quickly.

After getting off the plane and going into Kalamaki Airport (actually called airfield) we went to get our bags. Oh my God was it awful. As we arrived there was one belt still with bags from the last inbound flight. We were there for ages and ages getting our bags, and before we had got all of our bags there was another flight in from Manchester arriving and massive amounts of people were crowding the belt! In the end we all got out with our luggage mainly in one piece. Was damn hot there, but probably the coolest day of the holiday too.

Arrived soon after at Dora Studios, Argassi, and got the apartments sorted. When the bloke said that the apartments would be 1 double bed and 2 single beds (me sharing with Chris Nai and Emma) Chris and I shot up and shotgunned the single beds like a flash lol. Could not be F’ed to unpack at all, I was too tired. We decided to go rent the air conditioning for the week too, what a good idea that turned out to be, the air-con was a lifesaver.

After a quick trip to the pool bar we decided to go out and eat as a group of 13 in Argassi. We found a nice restaurant and had a nice meal. Wasn’t feeling overly hungry, and was feeling slightly ill from travelling all day so didn’t eat it all boo. Reckon I should’ve shared with Gem as she had the same pizza and didn’t finish it either. After the meal, a few went out to some bars or clubs I think, but I was just shattered so went to bed, which was probably the earliest that I went to bed all holiday.

 

Monday 4th – The day of “The Night”

This was a day to be remembered. I’m sure I can speak for us all when I say that we will remember what “The Night” means long into the future.

During the night, Chris and I froze our balls off as we left the air-con on the coldest setting and it was literally freezing (well, 17 degrees felt like freezing). I even got into full length PJ’s in a distinct laziness to find the remote for the air-con unit lol. Never saw a mosquito, but I reckon that they all died of hypothermia or something.

This was the first day that we got to use the pool. Nice pool with a distinct lack of annoying little kids that normally float about; pissing in the water. We met Sam, Tom and Julie today which was a laugh. Miles twins crack me up most times. After sating by the pool for most of the day I decided it was time to make good use of the poolside bar. I ordered a “Richie Burger” which was €3, and it was lush with nice onion (like red onion iirc) 2 burgers, cheese, lettuce and tomato. Also sampled the local beer; Mythos, priced at €3 for a large massive glass. Nice stuff and the glasses used are from a freezer and they are so lush and cold.

This evening we decided to eat in and so we trundled down to the “Best” supermarket in Argassi. I love how original the names are for these places. To be fair the place was a bit legendary; as it had a wine and spirits section that could put most British supermarkets to shame, as well as all the necessities for eating and drinking. (in case you didn’t know already; the tap water is not really drinkable and you cannot flush paper down the bog. The water in the shop was like €1.50 for 6x 1.5 Litre bottles which was decent considering a single bottle of water in England probably costs way more than that!). We just got simple pasta with a tomato sauce and some drinks for the meal, and left Nai to do most of the cooking <Sexism> Well the women should be better ;-) </Sexism>. It was quite nice considering it was simple. But, for letting the girls do most of the shopping, we ended up with “Coke Lite”; better than Diet Coke in all fairness, it was drinkable, but still not the real thing. I wish they had it in the UK, along with the Smirnoff bottles that have built in Vodka ends or something like that, so damn sweet.

After we had finished our meal, and I had had my Bud and a few triple strawberry schnapps and sprite drinks (I know, fem drinks, but still nice ;-)), we went down to the pool bar to have cocktails and stuff. Legend of a barman there, Dimitris was his name, cocktail making was his game. I really couldn’t see anything non-alcoholic going into the “Orgasms” that he made, legend. Happy hour was fun and extended so cocktails where only €3 each, and were quite large too. Steph had to go to doctors to get her foot sorted out as she stood on a sea urchin earlier in the day whilst at the beach with Sam and Tom, it wasn’t very good as the insurance wouldn’t cover it and she ended up having to pay up €100 for basically very little.

Anyway, after Steph got back we decided to go on a bar crawl around Argassi. The first bar (and also last bar) that we visited was the “Lucky 10” bar, what a place. This place had couches and comfy chairs and a big TV and above all; cheap drinks. Shots were normally €2 but George the bar owner decided to let them go for only €1, and they were free when you bought a cocktail for €3, bargain! I was already wankered when I got to the bar and was off my face after having 2 or 3 cocktails there with the free shots and an extra shot too. Chris and Kate were playing semi-drunk Poole and Mike and Han were having a go at table tennis. Kath had broken one glass already, and Emma came up to me and said “Andy could you look after my bag” whilst throwing it onto the table taking out another glass! I couldn’t stop laughing!

Into Tuesday 5th

Also, what girls won’t do for free shots?!? I think they had fun, but it started to look like the bar was turning into a lesbian orgy. When I saw that some of the girls were finding it hard to stay standing though, I sobered up pretty quickly coz I knew that they weren’t gonna be able to get back walking by themselves. Gem was trying to text Will but was almost falling over, and the messages didn’t really make any sense at all either lol, so I sent a message to him (damn hard on a phone I’d never used before and had no help either) just in-case he was worried thinking Gem was on her own. Met the bar tender called Matt, and he was just plain amazed at the sight of 10 girls and almost all of them plain getting off with each other!

After leaving the bar, the girls were sat on the steps outside. Yet another drink was knocked over, but luckily it didn’t smash the glass. When I got to the steps, only Kath, Laura, Nai, Gem and sober Mike and Han were left. Kath and Laura wanted to go clubbing but to be honest they couldn’t really talk or walk properly at that point, Laura wasn’t that bad but Kath was off her face. Nai and Gem were just collapsed on the floor; not really in a state of mind to go clubbing me thinks. After some persuasion we decided it would be best to go back to the apartments. I had a look around for the others but I couldn’t find them anywhere, they’d just gone and were nowhere to be seen. I couldn’t exactly hang around much longer as the girls needed to get back, they were 100% wasted and the others could have just left without saying for all I knew. With Mike and Han’s help we managed to get them back to the apartments in one piece. It turns out that drunken Kath likes to try and walk in the road and into things.

After we got back, Mike and Han left as Laura was thinking straight. Nai was feeling very ill, not surprisingly, and Kath was going on about it being the end of the holiday already and wanting sun cream on her feet so she didn’t burn amongst other things! Got Gem to her room and spoke to Will on the phone, mainly to reassure him that Gem was home safe. By this time I had a splitting headache but I was still thinking and walking straight so I don’t know what that was all about, never had one as bad as that before. I think Gem was the most behaved; Kath kept getting out of bed and coming into our apartment worried about choking and sun cream, but was mostly worried about Steph, whereas Gem managed to go to her room, get changed and go to bed without any fuss; I was impressed for 5 minutes, and only 5 minutes because then something else happened.

Soon after finally getting Kath to stay in her apartment, Chris came in and said something along the lines of “Emma’s been in a car that’s gone off the road!”. He was looking for help to get the car out of the ditch that it had apparently gone into. It turns out that Em and Charlotte had stayed near the bar and they had been looking for a taxi, but instead took up the offer of George, the bar owner, to take them back to their apartments. I think he had had a few to drink and was apparently run off the road by an oncoming car and went into a ditch. As Chris and I walked down the street towards the centre of Argassi, we saw the twins with Steph (or at least one twin but I can’t remember that clearly), so we waved for them to get Steph back to her apartment, mainly because she was wasted and Kath was worried lol. After that we found George, actually randomly as it turns out that we were going in the wrong direction to find the car so I can’t think what George was doing there. He was pissed off because he lives up the mountain and has no car anymore, and wanted to find Matt the bartender to help pull the car out of the ditch or something, he was also going on about getting a tractor or something to get the car out. Crazy stuff, and I had a headache so I asked Chris if we should just go and leave it for a bit, find out where the car is and take a look; so we took a 5 minute walk, back up past our apartments, and up the hill a bit more and found the car in the ditch. I took a photo on my phone ##### and then we decided to just go back to the apartments to see how people were coping.

Apparently, Chris had brought Kate home, so she was looking after Charlotte, who wasn’t talking too much sense, and Laura was looking after Emma and Nai. On the way back we saw Steph leaving again, trying to walk Sam and Tom back to their hotel, so Chris went with them to walk Steph back after, and I went up to help Laura out.

When I got back to our apartment, I could see that Emma was very, very ill and I was worried so I phoned my mum up to ask for some advice. Little did I realise that it was 2:30am here and so I was calling at 12:30am at home waking everyone up lol. I went to check on Kate and Charlotte, and stayed there for a bit while Kate went to check for “2 mins” on Emma. 15 minutes later, Laura turned up and we both left to go back to my apartment. On the way back, some random woman, from the floor below, came up and had a go at Laura as she could hear laughing! It wasn’t us but we said sorry for any noise anyway. (It turns out that later on, after I checked on Charlotte again, someone downstairs was making the noise as the woman was having a massive shouting match in the corridor, I just went up to them and asked them to calm down as it wasn’t helping anyone.)

After I got back to the apartment, Vix was back after being God knows where, and Mike, Han and Chris were there after helping get George’s car out of the ditch. I remember having a kind of anxiety attack, my heart was beating really fast for no reason, and showed Mike, was proper freaky.

Later on ( about 3:30am give or take) Kate had gone to sleep on Chris’ bed and Chris, Laura, Vix, myself and a passed out Emma were in Em’s room talking (well Em wasn’t really talking). Nai had gone to sleep in Kate’s apartment I just went to check on all of the girls in the other apartments every 15 minutes to check that they were ok. About 5am, Laura and Vicky left and Chris had to sleep on the floor as Kate stole his bed. We didn’t know what had happened to Emma, so she could have had a concussion, so I decided to check on her every 30 minutes to see if she was ok until I fell asleep for half an hour sometime between 7 and 8am.

At about 9 o’clock I stumbled down to the pool and nicked us some sun-beds for the day, and dragged myself to the bar where I ordered my Full English breakfast with coffee. It was only €4 for Orange juice, coffee, toast, jam+butter, 2 eggs, beans, sausage, English bacon, tomato and mushrooms! Thank God for coffee is all I can say to that; so far I’m at 25 hours with only 30 minutes sleep. As I sat down to eat, I found that the family that the mad shouting woman belonged to was sat on the table opposite. She said hello and apologised for what had happened, was a simple mistake, and I ended up talking for ages with her and her husband about random things.

After breakfast I wanted to go swimming, but not many people came to the pool, they were all pretty rough and messed up from what I can remember.

Later in the day, some random people were leaving to go home and donated to us some pool stuff like a bat and ball set, a lilo and a volleyball. Had some fun with the bat and ball set, even though I was shattered. Lazed about at lunch time talking to Kath and Gem.

For our meal we had booked at a restaurant called “Castaway” and the guy called Pete who owns the restaurant that’s basically next-door to Castaway tried to get us to go to his restaurant coz he overheard us booking a table for 16. He basically pestered us every time we walked past; “You come here! We have good food! You eat here tonight, eat Castaway other night.”. Anyway, the meal at Castaway wasn’t great; far too much BBQ sauce on my chicken for it to be nice, and waiting for the food/bill was like waiting for a girl to admit that they are wrong, it just wasn’t happening.

After going to the apartment to get ready to go out for a bit, Em and Vix left to go to Lucky 10 bar to apologise for all the destruction that we had caused on Monday night. By get ready, I mean have a few vodka mixes lol. Apparently Em and Vix were only going to be a few minutes so we were waiting for them outside by the pool, but after about 30-45 minutes we decided to leave to go to factory anyway. I wanted to go check to see if they were ok, but as with any of my ideas it was dismissed as BS lol. Anyway, this was at about 11pm lol so when we arrived at Factory the back section, where the main clubbing area is, was actually as packed as a car-boot sale in the middle of Antarctica. Also, there was no DJ yawn. Mike and I just looked at each other and knew what each other was thinking so we headed for the door without hesitation.

After we got back to the apartments, finally somebody decided that we should check to see if Emma and Vix were ok; now why didn’t I think of that? Sure enough though, as we (myself, Nai and Laura) got to the Lucky 10 bar, there they were still chatting away. After we had asked when they would be leaving and they said soon I thought I would stay to make sure they got back ok after what happened on Monday. Before I could tell Nai and Laura that I would be staying; they had gone and were like dots on the horizon lol. Well, might as well have a few drinks whilst I was there then lol, and that I did. Vix was saying she was tired and looked a bit wankered so I said that I’d walk her back if she wanted. After sitting outside with Matt and Vix for a bit, being joined by some random people with scouse accents that weren’t from Liverpool and having my free shot, we decided to leave. Emma wanted to stay, against my better judgement I left her, but half way back to the apartments we met a Pate’s search party. Kate, Nai and Laura were all a bit worried about Em so we walked back again to Lucky 10 bar.

Into Wednesday 6th

As I arrived again, I got a look from Matt and I just said “for the love of God; please don’t ask because even I don’t know anymore!”, and he just laughed. Long and short of it, we decided to leave Emma again, I seem to be repeating myself, that’s because I have all the best ideas then they are repeated grr. Eventually made our way back to apartments, stayed by pool bar again for a but, but then went to bed as I was knackered, was about 1:15am so it had been 41 hours without proper sleep urg.

**9 hours later**

Woke up really late, so late that it was almost time for lunch, and a big lunch at that lol. Chris had gone to Laganas with Nobby to see some turtles if they could find them, I would have gone with them but I was just too tired still, I wanted to have a lazy day by the pool. The heat was immense and I was desperate to get into the pool, I just floated about on the lilo talking to Gem; really relaxing and a great chill out. The only reason I left the pool was to get food; a glorious, lovely cheeseburger that I got from the poolside bar.

When the volleyball started up in the pool I left to go to the apartment, there was no way I was gonna play volleyball, not on my laze about day! We had to wait for Chris to get back before we could cook, and oh my God was I starving or what?! When Chris eventually turned up, he brought tales of seeing turtles and journeys with mad taxi drivers (something that I can later vouch for). Same old food was cooked, but this time there was something odd about it all. After seeing this come out of somebody, and then 2 days later to eat the same meal again, I couldn’t help thinking about eating vom; urg, utterly disgusting.

After meal, and after numerous drinks of all kinds (the usual bud + vodka mixers), we went down to the Pool bar for drinks, cocktails and just a general chat. Steph looked a bit upset about something, not entirely sure what but I can take my guesses, then again I was very drunk by that stage so I’m not quite sure that she was. I ended up telling Kate some personal stuff about some people that I really shouldn’t have, but then again I’ve been treated like shit by them recently so I don’t really care anymore to be honest.

After the bar I went back up to the apartment, and ended up apologising to Nai because I was in such a funny random mood in my lack of soberness, ended up having a full on war with a mosquito and taping up Chris’ sun cream bottle for some reason, not to mention talking utter BS for an hour. After that I finally stumbled into bed at about 1am lol.

 

Thursday 7^th

Woke up early, at about 6:45, to make toast before we had to get the bus for the boat cruise that we were going on. As we got to the bus stop, there was mild bedlam as Mike realised that he had lost the ticket! We ended up just getting the kind woman who was running the groups to write us out another ticket for the cruise, although I can say that there is never a dull moment on this holiday, not even at 8am in the morning!

The cruise boat was nice and big, and iirc we were the first group to arrive so we got the first choice of seats on the boat. As we cruised around the north face of Zakynthos island, I saw some of the most breathtaking landscapes you could ever imagine, some really good photo opportunities, but guess what the one thing that I decided not to bring was… my bloody camera; I was absolutely kicking myself. The waters were so clear, just like the lush Mediterranean waters that you see on the postcards, it was amazing.

Out first port of call was in a cove called “Smugglers Cove”; named so because it has a shipwreck on the beach of an 80’s smuggling ship, chased in there by the coastguard, and then pillaged by locals when it ran ashore in a power failure. The cove itself was beautifully picturesque; white cliffs that were really tall, amazing beach and brilliantly clear water that was sky blue. The cruise boat reversed up so we could go onto the beach. Randomly, some woman went up to Laura and called her a beached whale, and stupidly; Laura then proceeded to tell everyone, so you can guess what Laura was called for the rest of the holiday lol.

Our next stop was at a harbour, where there was a nice beach and some good shops. Chris and Steph swam out to an island, it was really far to swim and I didn’t really wanna run all the way back to the boat to dump my stuff and all the way back and then swim, I would have fallen asleep half way lol.

We also stopped, on the way back, at some random smelly place due to sulphur in the water, randomness, but I didn’t want to smell like sulphur so I gave the swimming a miss. While some went swimming, Gem was happy and content singing funny songs to her self, such as “Yellow Submarine”; which was slightly abnormal but nevertheless very amusing.

That evening I managed to get a free drink off the holiday rep for getting his top-up for his phone as I did the shopping; score! There was some confusion as people didn’t want to go to Laganas again, Emma wasn’t best pleased but that would be expected. Instead, after we ate in, we went out to some bars in Argassi; first Kiss bar where they had Sky news on the big screen about the bombings in London, was a slightly depressing sight so we soon moved onto Avalon (looked like a massive castle lol) after taking a photo of a guy on the news who looked like Mr. Kemp. Avalon was slightly abnormal, mainly due to the fact that I’ve never been in a club that looked like a castle before!

A few drinks later and people wanted to move on to another club. I was slightly concerned for Chris as he had stayed at the apartments not feeling too good, looked like he had something troubling him too, so I decided that I’d have enough and go back; I was very tired again and also wanted to make sure Chris was alright. When I got back to the apartments I had to bang on the door for like 5 minutes coz Chris had gone to sleep lol. He seemed just about alright after I managed to wake him up to let me in.

 

Friday 8th

Woke up early, most people were going out to Laganas or Zante town iirc to hire speedboats and go looking for turtles and have a boat trip. Sounded quite good, but had a few reasons not to go. A few of us were going to go to Zante or Laganas (think it was the same as the others, probably Laganas, I never pay that much attention, it was more a matter of me caring when I had arrived there and not before lol) to go and snorkel and perhaps see a turtle or two there, but after speaking to the rep he had told us that where we were planning on going was apparently not that good, so we decided to leave it and instead we would go to Kalamaki tomorrow and rent pedalos and stuff. We ended up basically just lazing about most of the day, after a spot of shopping; mainly for chocolate for me (white chocolate is my saviour), we just went and relaxed by the pool again.

We had some real confusion over eating plans for the evening, half wanted to eat in and half wanted to eat out. To be honest, I didn’t think I could stomach another night of pasta (no matter how lovely you made it Nai, you were great cooking, nevertheless it was getting repetitive), although I did feel for the people who were broke and offered to give them some money so we could all eat out together.

We ended up all going out to Castaway again, after being harassed by Pete again on the way lol. The meal was slightly better this time, although I did feel sorry for Nai coz hers didn’t turn up until way after the rest of the other meals, and they got Chris’ meal wrong too. Ah well, c’est la vie. Mike and Han didn’t join us, instead they went for a romantic meal for 2 somewhere, were apparently the highlight of the evening was a group of drunk girls slapping the hell out of a waiter, and then the waiter started to fight back and threatened to hit them with bottles of wine! Very funny story lol, wish I could have seen it. The highlight of my meal, to be perfectly honest, was leaving the restaurant.

After we got back to the apartment (~11:30), and I had had my few drinks (honest I’m not an alcoholic), we went to play cards by the pool bar (yes; where I had another few drinks). After a couple of rounds of Shithead, where we were playing with some very dodgy rules indeed, most decided to leave to go to bed, after which Vicky joined Chris and I as we watched Sin City with no sound and just chatted about loads of things in general. We decided to go on a walk around Argassi for some reason, it was actually quite good, walked and talked for ages and ages and then went to a 24/7 snack bar where Vix ordered a waffle that was bigger than Chris’ head, no shit.

After, we went back to our apartment and just sat around and talked, Nai, Vix, Chris, Charlotte and I just sat around in the big room and we chatting for ages, mainly waiting for Kate and Em to get back from Laganas, but I didn’t really think that they’d be back in any great hurry to be honest. Chris was being absolutely hilarious with his Will Smith music, actually cracked me up so much, wish I had a video.

After every1 had gone / gone to bed, Emma and Kate stumbled in and showed me their weird printed tops that they had done. I say weird, I mean unusual, although that means the same thing in effect; Kate’s said “Lashed 18”, yeah; slightly odd.

 

Saturday 9th

Yet again I was up late, but we were excited slightly about going out to Kalamaki in the afternoon to go to the beach and get pedalos. Me, a.k.a Starvin’ Marvin ordered a gigantic Full English again for a lunch / late breakfast combo. This time, upon embarking on our fearful journey to Kalamaki beach, I decided to make sure that I had my camera with me!

We went to the centre of Argassi to get 2 taxis to take us (me, Steph, Vix, Kath, Kate, Gem and Laura) to Kalamaki. Oh my God, the taxi ride there was and experience all by itself. Mad, mad drivers rexing down the centre of the narrow roads at like 90mph! Was also a tad worried when I saw a sign saying (<- Καλαμακι) and we went right but then realised that the beach was miles away from the town so it was all cool.

When we got to the beach, just about in one piece, we hired out 2 pedalos that each held 4 people, they were legendary, loved them. After we had been out for a bit we found a turtle, it was really cool even though it wasn’t a big one, we chased it a bit but it got away lol.

After a while the girls all just wanted to sunbathe on the pedalos, which for me wasn’t the greatest time, I wasn’t allowed to pedal out on the pedalo as they wanted to stick together for some reason even though conversation wasn’t really peaking, but it did take the piss when somebody actually walked past our pedalo because we had drifted in to the shallows near the beach. I just liked crashing the boats together, and Steph had her own little rave on the back of our pedalo at one stage, it was a fun time but we didn’t end up seeing any more turtles. At the end, they only charged us for 1 hour rental instead of 2 hours which was good, only €10 per pedalo!

The taxi ride back was much tamer than the ride there, even though cutting some of the corners meant taking a more scenic route lol. I went to the pool after we got back, Mike, Chris and Han were there so we had a mess about, then most others joined in, but Kate didn’t look to happy again. We had some fun with the iced water too lol, not sure that Laura had much fun, as it was her that had the water tipped over her, but the rest of us did!

After chilling out in the evening, and the girls doing their hair for about 3 hours or more, (and Nai taking her usual absurdly long time in the shower :-p) we went to a really nice restaurant called Carismo I think. Perhaps I just made that name up in my head; I don’t remember it to well, but we all had €13.50 each from putting in too much money for the holiday, so we all had some very nice meals there, even though mine was really late arriving at the table, nevertheless I still didn’t finish my meal last (yes I am a pig).

After the meal, we went back to the apartment and had a few drinks, and then promptly left to meet at the Pool Bar for some more drinks. Dimitris gave us a pen to write on the brick wall with, just to leave a message like others had done before. Just before we were about to go out to Factory; Dimitris came over and just told you to lean your head back as he poured Tequila down your throat! My God there was a lot, I reckon at least 6 shots worth, and it burned like hell, and as I pulled away I managed to get it all down my shirt lol, smelled nice ;-)! What a legend of a barman.

 Into Sunday 10th – Leaving day

Factory was legendry this time round, some real tunes were bein played, was awesome. As we were in there, I found Simon (the waiter that we had both nights that we went to Castaway, and looked just like Ben Stiller (Gaylord Focker from Meet the Parents/Fockers)) and pointed out that we were all there. I remember whilst dancing that Chris had an obsession with removing his top, and the two times that he did he was told to put it back on by the bouncers/staff lol, Chris you crack me up so much it’s almost untrue. I managed to find the women’s loos whilst desperate for a slash lol, that was a tiny bit embarrassing to be fair. What else happened there? Apart from some of the best club tunes around, and some bar dancing from some of the girls, not much, but oh what’s this I remember??? Katie leaving early with Greek guy Aurelio (name funny due to the fact that we had already met a Tasos, so we has a Tossoff and Oraling; I swear it was funnier at the time, honest) dunno what they left for **whistles**. Oh and I remember turning around and seeing Kath, or part of Kath with some Greek dude down her throat rofl, as always Steph was on hand with the camera!

We ended up leaving the club at 3am ish, with ears ringing due to the lush sound system that the club boasted, not to mention the tens of thousands of pounds worth of lighting equipment they had! We just went to our apartment and talked in the big bedroom again as Vix and Charlotte came to ours after complaining that they had seen scenes of an unpleasant nature in their apartment (naughty Kate, tsk tsk). We had a laugh, but some people had already gone to bed, like Kath and Gem and I think Laura had too. Perfect opportunity for some fun, as Chris demonstrated by attempting to go and fart on Kath, again really funny at the time, well not for Kath but it was for the other 6 people watching! We ended up going to bed at about 5am; I remember saying to Chris “Oh shit we gotta actually be out of this apartment in 7 hours and we ain’t even gone to bed yet!”.

**4 hours sleep**

Woke up early, and it was like hangover central. Surprisingly I found that I was the first one up, but then again I knew I had to start and finish packing within 3 hours. Packed everything up, including excess vodka and schnapps into my case lol, and was ready to go by 12, but then had to wait for 5 hours before we left. Was so hot waiting by the pool bar all day, also went to the souvenir shop to get some gas lighters with some Barium in the top so the flame was green, really good buy!

On way home, airport was an absolute nightmare; really crowded and everything was so slow, but still apparently not as bad as other times according to the reps. Saw a security dude with an MP5 (after me and Chris laughed at a stupid bint who said “Look at that boy with a gun” to which we both franticly turned around to see a massive security dude *sigh*). Saw “The Wedding Date” on the plane home, was better than Su Doku again, but was still lame.

Back at Gatwick I was tired and stressed, and there was more of me suggesting ideas that were turned down, only to be suggested by somebody else and taken up grr. But it was really fast getting through nevertheless, so I was happy.

Into Monday 11th

After arriving home, I tidied my stuff up a bit and then said goodbye to my family as they departed to leave for the south coast of Portugal at 4/5am, then slept like a brick until 11am.

 

Here ends the Zakynthos Chronicles, as seen by Andy. Hope you didn’t die or age too much when reading this.
Thank you for reading, and would be nice to have comments especially from the people who were there, but no big deal.

Andy

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